From his website: Many moons ago - before the invention of Ritalin or the Internet - a young, broke college student named Roberto Antonio Smiley signed up for a stand-up competition at his Student Union Building. The prize money was $500, which was nearly 5 months rent for the "efficiency" closet Smiley was living in at the time.

Though he had never stepped on a stage, and the only prior laughs he had gotten were due to his colossal leprechaun ears, he went for the gold. When he arrived, his only competition was a grown man wearing an oversized sombrero with no act..