I was born in the summer of 1955 in my house. As soon as that happened, I was given a spank on each buttock to show me what life was about, and they immediately started feeding me Canarian gofio.

The unending food gave me a superstuffed chubby look that to this day triggers irrepressible belly laughs in those who see my baby photos. At age 10, I mastered the art of making my classmates laugh without the teachers noticing. In my teenage years, I was sent as an intern to a “model” school for priests who beat me in the face if I did not behave.